Urban Why?
Tony came into the kitchen during Street Church and pulled me aside.
“A.B.” his face was intent and showed a concern beyond his 12 years, “Why does God make all these bad things happen to us if He’s supposed to be good and strong?”
I was truly speechless. For one – what a question, and two – I had no idea that Tony was putting together such complex information. He’s a really smart kid.
And I'll be honest with you, I stumbled with what to say. Sure I could rail on about how we caused all this trouble or emphasize that God wants our love to be sincere so He gave us freedom and choice – but it just seemed so top shelf of the library rather than the urban streets we live on. These kids live out the things that wake us up in nightmares. They know darkness in a gripping tangible way.
Tony and I talked for a little while about sin in the world and a God who truly is powerful and good. Later that night we gathered with the kids and I prayed over them. As they sat quietly (somewhat!) with their eyes closed I asked God to meet us in the mystery of the things we don’t understand. Comfort us in the not knowing. Help us to trust what we cannot comprehend.
As we were cleaning up that night I asked my volunteers about what had happened with Tony. We nodded heads and even shared our own struggles with carrying the ache entwined in our hearts while still deeply desiring to lean on a God whom we believe to be both good and powerful.
I believe that God is Sovereign. I believe it at such a level that this is something I would die for. But I also live on city streets paved with immense injustice and unimaginable pain. Do I believe that God has lost his edge? Never. But some days the whole thing is more of a mystery than others. All week I've been mulling over Tony's words and asking God to help me speak to the boy. When I found this little parable it seemed no less than a Sovereign God once again weaving His mercy into our condition.
A man was fishing on a quiet lake after dark. The air was still, and the moon was reflected perfectly in the water. After looking at if for a while, he whimsically cast his lure into the reflection. The image shattered into a thousand pieces. Now had the moon actually been broken? Of course not! The reflection had. He had only to look heavenward to assure himself that the moon was still there, shining in all of its beauty.
Look up dear friends. Look up.
***join us here for new updates and stories from the neighborhood***
Rev. Amy Beth "A.B." Augustin Barlow
The Third Story, Inc.
(All names and identifying details have been changed to protect anonymity. All pictures are randomly chosen from our ministry and do not reflect the actual individuals in the story.)
Comments
Amy - Thanks for your honesty in reflecting on this question from this young boy. I constantly wrestle with the challenges of it all myself often, and tend to desire to lean to ignoring it altogether. Yet, for people, and kids like this one, we need to live into the tension there for a minute. For they have no "minutes" to spare, and we are their tangible presence of a God who cares.
Thanks...
Posted by: El Sam I Am | March 20, 2006 02:42 PM
Amy - thanks so much for this post. I work with teenage Romania orphans who live in a government run institution. They constantly ask questions such as the one Tony asked. They believe & feel God with them while they are with us at camp during the summer but struggle so much with where He is once they are back at the orphanage. They wonder where He is while they are being abused daily by the very people who are charged to care for them. I personally struggle so much with how to answer those questions. I believe He does enter into their struggles alongside them but I'm not the one enduring their circumstances. The last thing I want to do is give them pat answers. I really appreciate your thoughts.
Posted by: Diane | March 23, 2006 06:47 AM